(my) Feelings, Naked

What is wrong with me ?

Every person that I knew failed me,

everyone of them showed me that friendship is an ilusion,

or,

is something wrong with me ?

Is so difficult to find peace, to be happy ?

Everyone feels alone,

or is just me ?

Is there anyone not thinking only for himself/herself ?

Or, is something wrong with me ?

I feel I’m losing the game

I know sadness, and anger is ON

I’m afraid of what I can become

I can’t ask for help,

I can’t believe in anyone,

every person I know teach me that trust is an ilusion

and, I’m a dreamer, a fool

Why is so difficult to find peace ? Why is so difficult to find happiness ?

Is too much to ask for love, acceptance, a friend, a brother, a family,

someone in who I can trust ?

Negative thoughts cloud my mind

Anger is ON

I know sadness

Evil ghosts surrounds me

… is there a place where I belong ?

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10 thoughts on “(my) Feelings, Naked

  1. It is hard to find someone who is trustworthy, but there are those who are trustworthy. Please discern on whom to ask for help. Trust isn’t an illusion. Trust is intangible and turns into tangible when the person keeps his/her promises. I know and understand anger is turned on when you are betrayed by those you trust. Your mum accepts you and love you.

    • Thank you for the comment. My mother loves me and I love her too, but, there are days that I feel totally alone. My “friends” only think for themselves, and I can’t trust them, I used to trust them, but, they are not trustworthy, and, is very difficult to make new friends, people are too much self-centered, they only think about themselves and what you can give to them. Of all my friends, I think, I only really trust one. Sometimes all that I want is just a hug, someone that phone me and ask me : “Are you ok ?”. Everyone needs to feel accepted …

      … but, I know this feelings will pass, I’m acostumed to those days, grey-negative-days.

      Well, thank you for reading me, Yoshiko, I think you are a beautiful person.

    • It can be … Maybe we are too much sensitive (hyper-sensitives) and every little thing hurt us like hell. Maybe we expect people to be like us, and we trust them with all our hearts, and then, we understand that they are not like us, and wee feels like fools … I don’t know …

      • Yes you are right. I have seen this among all the really good people around me. An honest heart is always broken by others. This is like an implicit law of nature. I think a mix of shrewdness gets one’s way to a happy life

  2. It should be remembered always that only those who are sincere, good at heart are tested for their goodness. Those who do not have these traits have nothing to show and nothing to lose also. Very nice description.

      • My sincere gratitude.

        Yours is a most practicable solution. If only all of us have the same idea then most of our problems are solved.

        Regards

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